Thursday, December 16, 2010

Rex Ryan Buries Sal Alosi Following Embarrassing Tripping Incident

FLORHAM PARK, NJ - Jets coach Rex Ryan, known as the "ultimate motivator" sent a message to his team following their loss to the Miami Dolphins . Rather than the usual boardroom meeting, Ryan asked the players and staff to follow him outside. Leading them to a park near the Jets stadium, Ryan revealed his plan to hold an informal "funeral" and produced the body of strength coach Sal Alosi, wrapped in a carpet. Alosi had become the center of controversy after tripping Dolphins' player Nolan Caroll as Caroll ran down the sideline.

"We are going to put Sunday into the earth," said Ryan to his team as he rolled the staff member's body into a shallow ditch. "We are going to put this behind us and look to the next game."

Quarterback Mark Sanchez was impressed. "Rex, more than any coach in the league, makes such a powerful impression on his team. Most coaches will talk a lot about putting games behind us but he actually shows us. It was really symbolic." Added Sanchez, "I think I saw Sal's feet move a little when we started filling the grave."

The Jets have fallen to 9-4 and are vying for a wildcard slot into the postseason. Some have their doubts that Ryan's tactics will galvanize the team for the remainder of the season. "Burying Alosi won't change their record or their poor offensive line," remarked Redskins coach Mike Shanahan. The Jets, however, are taking the message to heart.

"We're already forgetting about last Sunday" said safety Darelle Revis. "Sal who?" Ryan concluded the makeshift ceremony by asking each of the players to put their fingerprints on the shovel used to both wound and bury Alosi. "We're all in this together," said Ryan.

Ryan asked each of his players to put their fingerprints on the shovel used to wound and bury Alosi. "We're all in this together," said Ryan.

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